


mathematician

by MarshmallowFudgeUp



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: "Unpopular Opinion", Fluffy, M/M, vague description of a panic attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-14 23:33:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8033320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarshmallowFudgeUp/pseuds/MarshmallowFudgeUp
Summary: Neil decided to stop counting. Andrew helps.





	mathematician

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to write this instead of reading for AP Psych. Oh welllll.

Neil was skilled at math. He enjoyed it. It was satisfying with how everything clicked together- how everything had an answer. It was a comfort in a world of doubt. He’s always had a thing for percentages and numbers. It was just the way he processed things. 

 

He had twenty-two different names. He had eight outfits on the run. He had two minutes to breathe. He had two weeks-- fourteen days-- at Evermore. His days were numbered-- the deadline counting down. 

 

He remembered Matt’s cell phone number. He knew Nicky was assaulted by four men. He recalled Dan gets her hair trimmed once a month. He heard Renee could keep Andrew on his toes for around fifteen minutes. He knew Kevin had gone skiing a total of zero times. 

 

Numbers were needed. Numbers were essential. 

 

He consciously decided to stop counting. To stop counting days. To stop counting moments that mattered. To stop counting what didn’t need to be counted. 

 

He lost track of how many times they’ve kissed. How many times they’ve had sex. How many times he said “I hate you”. 

 

For once in his life, he was okay with losing count. And slowly-- slowly-- it became natural to just  _ be  _ in the moment. He didn’t have to remember every little thing, and count every small gesture, because there would be more. So many more. 

 

But today-- waking up alone after knives and the smell of burnt flesh-- today was a bad day. 

 

_ 30 seconds. 2 minutes. Regain your breath and sit up. You are okay. You are not in the past. You are in the present.  _

 

_ 10-- 9--  _

 

The sound of the balcony door sliding open barely caught Neil’s attention. He focused on breathing-- he only had five seconds left to calm down. 

 

A hand grasped at the back of his neck, yanking him out of his thoughts. Hazel eyes pierced through him, bringing him back to himself. 

 

“... Andrew.” He said, voice hushed. He couldn’t help the shaking of his hands. Andrew kept his eyes on his face, ignoring the trembling. He was unwavering, hovering over his body. The only contact between them was between fingers and neck. 

 

Neil licked his lips, taking another deep breath. 

 

“You are Neil Josten. You live with me in an apartment with some annoying cats. Everything is okay.” 

 

He let the words sink in, and reassurance washed over him. He sagged a little, reaching up to let fingers skim at Andrew’s chin. Andrew allowed it, lips relaxing and telling. Years ago, he would’ve never shown that kind of softness. 

 

“What percent am I at?” Neil had to ask. He needed to get his mind off of Baltimore and Evermore and hurt hurt  _ hurt _ . 

 

“Does it really matter?” Andrew threw back after a moment. The truth was, Neil had stopped asking about it ages ago. And really, Andrew’s apathy didn’t let him keep up the farce. 

 

“No, I guess it doesn’t.” He finally replied. He cupped at Andrew’s cheek, silently requesting for him to come closer. Obliging, he leaned forward to peck Neil’s forehead. 

 

Neil sighed, feeling safe. And just like that, numbers were out of mind. 

**Author's Note:**

> Annnd my second AFTG fanfic! It's pretty short- but I couldn't get this thought out of my head. I think the whole point of the percentages was to establish that Andrew hated the fact that he was falling in love with Neil. I don't think he'd keep upping it after 100- especially at "unbearably cute" things Neil does. I don't think Andrew's apathy would allow it. And after years pass, I think it's just something that fades. 
> 
> I also think it's really important and such great development that Neil decided to stop counting. Anyways- hope you enjoyed! Let me know what you think.


End file.
